stop caring about other’s opinions
I thought it would be fascinating to discuss confidence and caring about what other people think. I’ve seen this topic discussed around the internet, and I wanted to give a slightly different point of view. I believe that everyone, no matter a celebrity or a fashion icon, has struggled with caring about other people’s opinions from time to time. Even if you have already gotten past this issue, I still hope that the mindset I talk about in this post can provide a new train of thinking for you.
I very much struggle with this issue every day, and I think this is completely normal. Walking down the street of my neighborhood, I find myself lowering my gaze to the ground as if all passing people were staring at me. If there is a cluster of students my age, I will put on my mask and rush past them, trying to avoid any form of engagement or eye contact. Dumping out the trash at night, I will change my homebody clothes into something more formal, just in case I meet somebody I know. I still think back to embarrassing incidents during elementary school and die inside, remembering just how awkwardly I behaved. Being insecure and not confident is a step towards change, and it is a part of being human. Social norms and social media may have amplified our insecurities, but we can still escape from these norms and make our way towards confidence.
It is the small changes in your everyday moments that lead up to courage, confidence, and fully accepting who you are. In my opinion, this small change depends significantly on your mindset. I like to think about this issue by imagining if I only had one life; this life. Imagine if the next possible moment, you could cease to exist. Would you rather spend the rest of your life gazing down and not speaking up because you care about what your colleague or classmates think? Or would you choose to speak up, ignore the *imagined* gazes of other people, to express your ideas and thoughts, the ones you have been holding back for most of the day? If this were your one life, you can’t let other people stop you from taking chances. You can’t let the opinions of other people take over your life. If you want to do something wild, go and do it, this is your life, not theirs. This mindset can be slightly more beneficial when dealing with familiar people in your life, it can help make every exchange less daunting, and you can learn to enjoy these exchanges much more.
However, if you worry more about what strangers think, just remember this:
Strangers, they don’t care, and even if they make judgments, the judgements will be forgotten. I know this is addressed in so many YouTube videos, but if I were to tell the truth, I still make judgments about random people walking down the street, but in a matter of minutes, that thought has passed, and I am getting along with my life just fine. The stranger is also living just fine. These so-called life daunting thoughts and judgments that we care about only really exist in our minds. These judgments don’t matter. It won’t change your life or destroy the rest of your day. These thoughts are simply a product of our mind and brain, neurons, and thought processes.
This mindset has already led to slight changes. I might not be able to look people my age in the eye, but I stare back at every other person (older to younger) who seems to be looking at me. I stare until they break away. After that, I feel more confident, and our life goes on normally. I suggest you simply try. Don’t be afraid. Apply the mindset, and the next time you think someone is looking at you, stare back. Stare back, win that contest, and go on with your life after that.
Though this is only a tiny step towards becoming fully confident in yourself, but trust me, these small actions count. Start by lifting your head, trusting yourself, and straightening your back as you walk. That is the first step toward becoming confident. Changing these small things in your form, then conquer the rest.